What is death if not a reminder of life and living?

It is with sadness this afternoon that I read of a great man leaving this life. He was an inspirational character, someone that I respected - although if am totally honest I was very shy and unsure around - I was somewhat intimidated by his presence and knowledge. I'm sure that was unfounded (not his presence and knowledge) but feel more than sure that was my stuff around figures of authority (that I'm moving through much better now!) than his goal.

It set me to thinking about death and what it really is. Possibly because alternatives were doing the hoovering, writing a book review (of a book I really like tbh) or starting my tax return and pondering in the sunshine with the dog lying at my feet felt a good option. There are, of course, many views. Some of my favourite books touch upon the topic. Dying to be Me by Anita Moorjani, Journey of Souls by Michael Newton both focus heavily on it, and both would be up there in my Top 10 books. Others will tell me, without hesitation that there is nothing following. This is it. It's a chat my dad and I have, with each quite polarised views.

So what does it mean that he's gone? So many things to so many people, and as ever, like I see all the time with my work, there is no one set response, no one thing that's OK to do or not do. To feel or not feel.  One thing that I feel is that there's a space. An invitation. A knowing that others can step up, step forwards, inspired by his path, his actions. To move forwards with love for him, to honour the memories and the joy that he brought to so many. And then is he really gone-gone? 

A feeling of really, truly, living in the moment, of being wide open to all that surrounds us. The truth, the lies, the humanity of it all. The trying to make the space a better place around us. Of kindness and compassion. Not sweating the small stuff but noticing the little things. That's what I feel when I remember the essence, the gentle presence of my Grandad. When I am at my best he guides me. When I'm not I can't blame him - that's all just me ;)

So I guess, like with so many things, I don't know what death really means, though what it means to me is a passage to another time, a reminder to fully live, to lean into life with all its messiness and crazy times. A reset, a debrief and time of letting go. The pain, the tears, the joy.  And I sit in the knowing that it doesn't mean the same to you, and send love for whatever is needed there.

So if this is all there is, then being here right now is a sacred gift I suppose, one to find our way through with kindness to ourselves and others. And if there's more then being here right now is a sacred gift I suppose, one to find our way through with kindness to ourselves and others.

With inspiration from so many, and love,

Em x